On March 13, I left my classroom on a Friday afternoon confused and a bit scared. My students left with lots of tears and questions after an announcement over the intercom surprised us with cancelling all after school sports and activities until further notice due to COVID19. As my students heard this while packing up for the weekend, they were bummed and even many in tears realizing that their seasons of gymanstics, wrestling, baseball, girl scouts, dance, had all just come to an abrupt stop.
I remember trying to calm their fears telling them it was probably only temporary and that it was to keep everyone safe with this new virus going around. I told them to make sure to bring all belongings home for the weekend in case we weren't back in school on Monday for some reason. I had them take home extra gloves, snow pants, and hats just in case. I had a hunch that maybe we'd be off for a week or two if this virus was getting to our state. We said our goodbyes with a high five or a hug like we always did. We wished each other a great weekend.
Sunday night we were told the governor had an announcement and it would be on tv at 7:00 p.m. I had gotten my girls bags packed for the next day. My lesson plans for Monday morning were ready to go. Our family was settling in like any other Sunday night,winding down from the weekend and ready to start another busy work week ahead. I remember when I heard the governor announce that school will be closed until further notice.. it was one of those outer body experiences. I felt my whole world change.. at first I kind of went numb.. and then the tears started. I cried so hard. I cried because I had no idea what this meant. I had no idea when we'd be back and if we'd be back. I cried because I worried for my students. I worried for my own daughters. I just worried (remember.. anxiety sucks!).
The next few weeks were a blur. Trying to balance a "new normal" with working from home, teaching my own daughters, and trying to now manage a household with a principal, a teacher and two children stuck at home 24/7. It was as if our entire worlds shifted over night. For the first few weeks, I was glued to the news. I would watch every news station, every governor's address, every presidential address.. just honestly in awe of everything happening.
It was surreal. We live in America in 2020. A world wide pandemic is something you only hear about in movies. It just didn't feel real. Hearing reports of people dying all over the world, suffering horrible, miserable deaths, people losing jobs left and right, unemployment rates sky rocketing, businesses closing... it was like living through a real live nightmare. I just wanted to wake up.
I tried so hard to make every day fun and full of activities to keep my daughters entertained, happy and away from all the sadness and devastation. We filled our days with crafts, baking, projects, writing letters, doing good deeds for people, trying to brighten others days, and lots and lots of school work. To be "quarantined or self isolated" during those first months was hard. We live in North Dakota.. where we had already been self isolated due to blizzards, -30 degree windchills, and a never ending winter.. now that spring was coming.. a time that all North Dakotans look forward to we were having to social distance again.. and isolate again. North Dakotans had just gotten done doing that! It was tough to watch everything we look forward to start to get cancelled.. concerts, local events, sports, activities,.. everything.
It felt like everything around us was changing.. and there was nothing we could do except stay home.
Well here we are in our 4th month of social distancing and our 4th month since this pandemic began in our part of the world. We are now getting used to this "new normal". Things arent quite as isolated as they were but they sure aren't what they were before March 13th either. Everywhere we go theres worry and fear of this invisible enemy.. this virus that is out there..
Our world definitely looks different too.. everywhere you go.. you cant escape it. Plexi glass, masks, and 6 ft apart signs are every where. Going to the grocery store or Walmart are the big outings for the week..and takes some self prepping to go.. do I have my mask? Do I have hand sanitizer? How do I get in and get out without catching "it"?
People are different too.. North Dakotans used to greet each other with big hugs, gather in the aisle at grocery stores to catch up and now I see people avoid each other in aisles at stores. They will walk the other way, will try to pretend they don't see you, or will turn away.. not because they are being rude, but because they are trying to social distance and keep you and them safe.
Social distancing.. its just that.. its isolating.. it makes us feel so lonely in a time where we need each other the most. I know its important for our health and safety.. I do. But it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt the soul a little every time a person goes the opposite way in a store, or a friend stands 6ft apart when they used to greet you with a hug.. its all for the greater good. Its just hard.
I do see a lot of good in it all though. I know God is working through this pandemic to better our world. Through tragedy there will be greatness. I truly believe that. Looking around our own small ND town, I have never seen the yards, gardens, and flower beds in town look so beautiful. I have never seen the grass in our parks look so green. I have never seen so many people adopting puppies and kittens to bring into their homes. I have never seen so much kindness just to brighten someones day.. a parade for a bday, a sign written on your sidewalk in chalk that says, We miss you, handwritten cards from family and friends, flowers sent just to say hi, people visiting loved ones from the windows at the nursing home.
2020 has truly been a reset for the world. This pandemic has shown us how little we really need. It has shown us the important things in life are not material things.. the important things in life are the people. The moments. The special time we get together.
We've learned to appreciate things we forgot about in our crazy busy world. We've learned to appreciate all we took for granted before. This time in our lives, in our history is scary. We don't know what is going to happen. We don't know when or if we will get sick. We don't know when or if our loves ones will get sick. We don't know when or if we will not have to go up town in a mask. We don't know when or if we will not have to sanitize each time we get into the car. But we do know that we aren't alone. We do know that together we can do great things. We do know that God will pull us through this. We just have to trust in Him. He will ride this storm with us. We just have to ask Him.
Dear Lord,
This time in our lives and in our history is scary. There is so much unknown. There is so much uncertainty. Please protect us from this virus. Please protect our family and our friends from Covid19. Please help a cure be found and for the spreading to stop. Please Lord help us get back to our normal lives but better than we were before.. appreciative of the small things that we used to take for granted. Please help us see the beauty in this storm. We know that with you we can get through this. In your name I pray, Amen
Comments
Post a Comment